Hallelujah, Holy S#$@!

3:00 AM Christmas morning I jerked awake in bed. Something was wrong. Gracie was whining. Gracie is not a whiner- a screamer, yes, but not a whiner. So, when I heard her whimpering next to me in bed I know something was wrong. I reached over and touched her forehead. She was sweating.

Quickly I jumped out of bed and hustled to my parent's nursery with Gracie. I rushed in and turned on the lights . . . nothing. The power was out because of the snow storm. I ran back in my room and grabbed my cell phone to illuminate the changing table. I stripped off Gracie's clothes and felt her legs. They were burning up. Using the cell phone to navigate around the room I searched for a thermometer, but I soon realized it would take me until next Christmas to find it if I continued with the process of treasure hunting in a room full of toys by cell-light.

I snatched Gracie again and ran up to my parents' room. "Mom," I beckoned in a yell-whisper that woke both my parents. "Thermometer?!" Mom sprung out of bed like a true veteran and rushed downstairs instantly, understanding the urgency of the situation.

I ran to the living room with Gracie, stripped her naked, and put a wet towel around her hot body. Mom was soon by my side, and by lantern-light we had the thermometer up her butt practically before we could lay her down. 103.

I looked at my mom with panic in my eyes. As a first time mom, I feel as if I am standing on the top of a teeter totter with neurosis at one end and negligence on the other, never quite able to keep my balance. "Should we call the doctor?"

"You're the mom," my mom replied, knowing I was insecure about my teeter tottering ability and would quickly snap if someone even suggested that I maybe could do things a little differently with Gracie. "Will you do it?" I asked, confirming the fact that I still need my mommy.

As my mom phoned the urgent care clinic, I ran downstairs to wake up Greg. "Greg! Gracie has a temperature of 103!" I shouted, irritated already that I felt so helpless. "No she doesn't," he answered, still asleep. "Greg!" I shouted again. He jumped out of bed, apparently having processed the situation.

We lunged upstairs to find my dad working on turning on the generator so that we would have power. My mom informed me that the doctor said to give her some Tylenol and bring her in. Soon, my dad, Greg, and I were in the car zooming up the driveway . . . and sliding back down.

You have got to be kidding me! I thought. Instantly, I pictured every awful scenario a first time mother pictures in her head when she has a sick baby, all of them ending in horrible Lifetime-movie, drama-style endings. I could tell that my dad, always quick to cuss out a crappy situation with drama of his own, was trying to hold it together for my sake.

By the time we gave it a few more runs at it and were clearly stuck in the snow, Greg had hopped out of the car and was trying to help by shoveling the snow behind the tires and giving my dad the "this-much-more-room signal" (My dad's boat trailer was in front of us) before we would have an even bigger problem. And sure enough on the next try we slid right into that "even bigger problem."

And here is when I paused my morbid thoughts long enough to have a different thought: My dad is truly a saint. You see, there is a stream of cuss words that has been passed down from generation to generation among the men on the Anderson side that is saved for the really, really crappy situations. And, I'm pretty sure this would qualify as one of those times. Yet my dad gritted his teeth and merely grunted "God Damn it" under his breath. Wow. What a guy. Both my dad and Greg were doing their best to make it seem like everything was fine.

However, the anger my dad must have felt was channeled into superior driving ability, and with one last push on the gas pedal, we were up the driveway with Greg running after us- shovel in hand.

By the time we were in the urgent care clinic, I was physically and emotionally fatigued and after accidentally telling the nurse that Gracie was a four and a half year old (which she could clearly tell she wasn't) the doctor was ready to see us. As soon as the doctor came in Gracie looked up and smiled. "Coo," she sang sweetly. The doctor took her temperature. 98.6. Really? You've got to be kidding me. The Tylenol had apparently kicked in and was doing its job, but with the rest of the family wide awake and traumatized we were ready for some drugs of our own.

Gracie's first Christmas . . . As they say on National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation: "Hallelujah, Holy S*%&! Where's the Tylenol?"

WEST SIDE! (Sorry, I just had to throw that in there. Our five month old is throwin' up signs.)

Dad's Little Snow Bunny

Cruel and unusaul punishment. (The coat, not the snow.)

The View from up Here

Baby Gracie has recently accomplished three giant feats: reaching for her toys, sucking her thumb, and best of all sitting up unassisted. It doesn't seem very difficult for her as she is so compact. She just hunches over and rests that giant belly of hers on those short chubby legs. We are still working on rolling over from her back to her front. She can almost get there, but she can't seem to get her arm out of the way. When did she get so big?

Entertain Me

Baby Gracie has been playing with toys. She's not impressed. She's rather stoic most of the time- a few squeals here and there and some shy smiles, but overall we get the impression that she is hard to please. I think she takes after Greg. He thinks she takes after me. Turns out that "snobby" look Paige was joking about might just apply. :) Meanwhile the rest of us are quite entertained with her antics! She's the cutest little snob we've ever seen!!!

Short Stack

Yesterday was Gracie's four month check-up, and we are proud to say she finally made the chart! She is no longer in the 0 percentile for height! She made it to the tenth percentile! Yet, the fact that her head and weight are in the 50th paints a picture of just how tubby our little girl has become! Dr. Koenig said no solid foods yet. "Clearly she is getting all the nutrition she needs from breastmilk." If they gave percentiles for thigh circumference I think Gracie would be off the charts. She's a tank!

On another note, for years now I have felt so blessed because I have always loved my job. I can't believe I get paid to do what I do. Yet, now that I have been back a week work feels like just that: work. Don't get me wrong; I can't imagine having any other job, it is just that it is so hard to leave my baby every day. I know it will get easier. This month she is hangin' with grandma Vicki. I know Gracie is doing fantastic, but I think grandma would love to get a shower in one of these days! We are so lucky she is here. Gracie also spent half the day on Thursday with Beth (in the picture) who will be watching her three days a week come January. We are so lucky to have her. We can tell that she adores Gracie, and that makes going to work MUCH easier. Between Greg, Grandma and Grandpa Fast, Grandma and Grandpa Anderson, and Beth Gracie is going to be very loved!!!

Happy Holidays!

Cousins Zoe and Henry and Matthew and Emily came down for Thanksgiving! We had so much fun! Maya even stopped by the next day for some leftovers and an early birthday present from "Grandma" Vicki! Holidays are so much more fun with a house full of wild kids!

I should have captured a video of this shoot. It was absolutely hilarious!!! Emily has taken quite an interest in cousin Gracie, and her mission seems to be clawing at her face and sucking on her head. Matthew is such a great big brother and cousin- always hamming it up and trying to make the girls laugh.

Not for the easily nauseated

(How, you might ask, does one get barf on her forehead? While I know this is disgusting, it is also quite talented.)

Most anyone that has spent any time at all around our daughter knows that she is quite the barfer, but until this morning it has been an issue of quantity rather than quality. This morning, I walked into the nursery to find Greg changing Gracie's diaper. She was making her normal morning gurgling sounds, so there was no indicator that she was about to blow. However, as soon as I entered the room I heard this awful spewing sound and Greg stumbled backwards tripping over the ottoman. Before I knew what had happened I was greeted with a familiar wet substance on my face. Yes, Gracie had just projectile vomited from her position of laying on her back to about 8 feet across the room and onto her mom as well as the dresser, floor, and clothes in the closet. . . not to worry though, our four-legged vacuum cleaner took care of it for us. Sick.

"Baby" Steps

Something monumental happened yesterday: Baby Gracie fell asleep in her crib. Yes, I know. It is unsafe to have pillows, blankets, stuffed animals, etc in a crib with a baby, but apparently she is able to fall asleep only if I make a little "nest" for her. And, no worries- I pretty much stood over her and watched her sleep as I was in awe of the accomplishment! :) We tried again last night, but no luck. There has to be a difference between babies who "cry it out" and those who fire engine siren it out, and I just can't bear the latter.

My get-up these days . . .

Yesterday Paige, Zac, Gracie, and I ventured off to the Woodburn outlet mall. The four of us have gotten quite adept at spending money since August, so I was attempting a hobby foriegn to me: window shopping . . . didn't quite master it. After pacing the public restrooms while Pagie nursed a screaming Zac, chowing down on half a jalepeno dog (payed for that later), and changing Gracie in a dressing room after a major blow-out, I was ready to spend a little money. As always, Paige and I made it through the day cracking up . . . even as Gracie's symphony of screams provided a symbolic sound track to our drive home.

"Yes We Can"

I think the image will forever be imprinted in my mind- Greg perched at the end of our bed fidgeting with excitement while I lay quietly next to him with Gracie sleeping in my arms, both smiling and fighting back tears at the same time. For weeks now Greg has paced the house grumbling nervously about his uncertainties of the world in which Gracie would grow up. And, normally optimistic I even found myself becoming quite cynical and apathetic. Yet Tuesday night restored our hope along with many others around the globe. . . and I'm sure we were not the only parents who when wondering whether or not we could finally be excited about the world in which our children will grow up responded silently with thoughts of "Yes we can. " :)

Happy Halloween!

Last night was our annual Halloween get-together at our house . We all took turns passing out candy, and Brian and Davey took Maya trick-or-treating for the first time! Darlene supplied us with purple potatoes for the baked potato bar, and we all hung out until 9 o'clock! (Which is the latest Greg and I have stayed up in months. Ha!) Friday nights sure are looking different these days! It was great to see everyone, and Gracie was a happy camper for the most part . . . I guess it's true what they say about the three month mark- things sure are getting a lot quieter at the Fast house!

Our Trips to Washington

Here are some pictures from Gracie's and my first trip to Washington! We have so much fun hanging out with the cousins- I can't imagine just how much more fun it will become as they get older! Also, check out that picture of Gracie and "Big Ben." Can you believe he was born just two and a half weeks before her? . . . Although, Gracie's cheeks are starting to look more and more like his!

At the end of September, Carol and my Aunt Linda threw a baby shower for Gracie. It was so great to see all of our family and friends! It was amazing how adorable all of the other babies and children were that attended. It was especially great to spend time with my nephew, Matthew, and my niece, Emily!

The weeks are starting to fly by!

I have yet to post many pictures of Gracie with her aunties, which is crazy because they are such a big part of her life! Here she is at school visiting auntie Melissa during lunch!

My parents came to visit, and Gracie was on her best behavior! We can't wait for them to come down for three weeks in December when I go back to work!We are sorry to say that Gracie is mesmorized by the TV. We are going to have to do something about that. In the meantime, we can't help but laugh at how much she looks like grandpa when she is zoning out on the football game. :) Here I am with TWO babies. Gracie is in the Bjorn, and Zac is in my arms. Who would have thought I was scared to hold a baby just three months ago!

Gracie looks like grandpa!

Gracie looks like Grandpa Garry!

"Those parents"

Gracie's first run-in with "the law!" Here we are at Auntie Michelle's graduation from the police academy! We are so proud of her!

Maya did such a great job holding Gracie!
I absolutely LOVE this picture of Greg's dad caressing Gracie's forehead.
Dad gets Gracie for most of the day on Sundays . . . she loves watching TV on dad's knees, and here she is actually sleeping somewhere other than in the Bjorn! Good job, dad!

In looking back on these blogs I realize that we are "those" parents. Greg and I were noticing how already in the last 11 weeks, we have acquired more pictures of Gracie than we have of the two of us over the past four years. Thus, I am going to attempt to take more pictures of our WHOLE family- friends included. In the meantime . . .

Perspective

Greg holding Maya, Molly holding Zac, and Ty holding Gracie





The other week Greg and I had our birthing class reunion at our house. As to be expected only two families showed up as the others were busy with the trials of life with brand new babies. It was fantastic though to spend time with the Lomas and Matthews families. I have spent a lot of time with Paige and Zac over the past few months, which has been such a blessing. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to have a friend with whom I can share all the joys of mommy-hood. However, it was so validating to talk with Molly and Ty at the baby reunion. Maya was also born with acid reflux and is pretty colicky too. Talking with Molly and Ty confirmed that every baby doesn't share the same constant contentment that baby Zac seems to have been instilled with, and that is perfectly OK!
Shortly after the reunion Greg and I learned that one of the couples we got to know during the birthing class had been dealing with much more than a little reflux and crying. Their baby, Ava, was born with Downs Syndrome and a hole in her heart. We are absolutely heartbroken for what their family must be going through. It certainly gave us some perspective and made us feel ridiculous for ever complaining that we had a "hard" baby. Our hearts go out to them, and yet we can't stop thinking about how they will be such great parents for baby Ava.





Greg and I are starting to settle in more to our "routine" (if you can call it that). Our favorite time of day is early morning when Gracie wakes up. She is all smiles and coos- especially with Greg. She is starting to become more content during the day and hopefully is realizing that there really isn't that much to cry (scream) about. :) She still insists on being carried around in the Bjorn for the majority of the day and loves going for long walks with her friends Paige and Zac.

Zac and Gracie in their parkas from Bolivia! (Thank you auntie Miranda!)

Gracie is starting to enjoy her toys!
Paige calls this Gracie's "snobby look."

Gracie's Getting Big!

Gracie loves bath time . . . She just doesn't like getting OUT of the bath. She's a screamer! :)















y!

Our little chunk is not so preemie anymore!
Here she is with her buddy Maya at the pumpkin patch. Maya is practicing her big sister role before her brother gets here in a few months!

What is that? Is Gracie actually SLEEPING??

Meet Baby Gracie!

Our Birth Story . . .

Greg and I woke up early on August 2nd to get a non-stress test before the baby shower at 2:00. My amniotic fluid was very low- 2.5 cm-, and she was breech with the cord around her neck. It had been a stressful week, and we were getting anxious to have our baby out and in our arms. Our plan was to run to the hospital quickly for the test while Davey and my mom got the house ready for the shower.

When we got to the hospital the nurse took us into the room and hooked me up to the monitors. Before she left the room she casually said, "Dr. Neeld is here this morning and wants to speak to you guys. You might be here longer than you had planned." Then she left the room. Greg and I looked at each other confused. Shortly after that Dr. Neeld walked in the room and sat on the edge of my bed. He explained that while it was still almost a month before her due date the risks and benifits of keeping her in versus taking her out were about the same, and would we like to have the baby today?

There was no question in my mind that this baby was ready to come out. Somehow my insticts told me that waiting any longer was not a good idea. We scheduled a C-section for 2:00. I called my mom to let her know that the baby shower would have to be moved to the post-partum room, and Greg ran home to pack our bags for our stay in the hospital. I sat in the hospital bed for the next hour listening to my baby's heartbeat on the monitor and trying to prepare myself for my life to change forever.

At noon my room was packed full of Greg and "the girls:" Davey, Hayley, Melissa, Cassandra, Michelle, and of course our eager moms. They kept me distracted until the nurse came in with Greg's scrubs at quarter to two. Everyone wished me good luck and I literally walked to the surgery room and got up on the table. It was the most bizarre and surreal moment.

I got my spinal, they put up the curtain, and the nurse went to get Greg. We decided to thumb wrestle to take my mind off of what was happening on the other side of the curtain. A minute or so in I asked the doctors if they had started yet, and they told me they were almost done. I felt a little bit of pressure and then we heard our daughter cry. . . then the tears began to fall.

I think Greg and I will always remember the image of Gracie being held up over the curtain screaming. She was a beautiful and healthy 5 pounds 0 ounces, and we were so relieved. The nurse layed Gracie on the table by me and when Greg and I started talking to her she stopped crying and looked right at us. It was amazing. She knew us. Needless to say, we were in love.